{"id":2335,"date":"2013-10-22T07:16:27","date_gmt":"2013-10-22T05:16:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kerstinpur.de\/?p=2335"},"modified":"2025-02-04T10:20:37","modified_gmt":"2025-02-04T09:20:37","slug":"discovering-life-and-asking-questions-costs-nothing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/leben-entdecken-fragen-kostet-nichts\/","title":{"rendered":"Discover life - asking questions costs nothing"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"IMG_0137\"<\/a><\/strong>Was I alive today?<\/h3>\n

Yes!<\/p>\n

Running through colourful autumn leaves and kicking them up with your feet is just lovely!h<\/p>\n

What new things have I discovered about life?<\/h3>\n

It costs nothing to ask<\/strong>. My theory is that people are almost always happy to help if they have the capacity and the means to support someone else in making their life better. It\u2019s just that often you don\u2019t know how you can help. Or you don\u2019t dare to ask,<\/p>\n

Over the last few days, I\u2019ve been asking a lot of questions:<\/p>\n

1. The brilliant online shop Avocadostore, which sells fair-trade and beautiful items \u2013 would they like to promote our 2014 calendar over the festive season?.<\/p>\n

\u2013 The answer: Yes, of course. And we\u2019ve put it on the homepage straight away.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

2. A friend, to see if he\u2019ll lend me his welder for a few days until I\u2019ve got my own working one (the monster I\u2019ve got on board doesn\u2019t have the right plugs, and I\u2019m a bit wary of learning to weld straight away with a dinosaur\u2026 no, don\u2019t worry\u2026 I\u2019ll just watch for now\u2026 then maybe I\u2019ll practise very carefully out on deck)\u2026<\/p>\n

\u2013 Answer: Jupp<\/i><\/p>\n

3. A sales assistant specialising in compact welding equipment \u2013 to see if I can get a discount.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Answer: Yes!\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

4. A waste water specialist (a friend\u2019s contact) to see if he can help me plan the waste water disposal system on the boat.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Answer: I\u2019d be happy to. I\u2019m more of a specialist in seepage water, but I\u2019d be happy to have a look at it \u2013 and if I\u2019m stuck, I\u2019ll recommend someone who can help.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

5. My dentist, to ask if he can repair a broken mouthguard that I\u2019ve temporarily fixed with superglue for the time being.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Answer: Please bring the rail round on Friday. I\u2019ll sort it out over the weekend.<\/p>\n

6. A friend in Hamburg \u2013 could he pick up a cheap second-hand wood-burning stove for my boat in Hamburg and bring it over for me\u2026 so it\u2019ll be cosy.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Answer: Sure.<\/p>\n

7. A brilliant professor and architect specialising in sustainable building, to see if he and his students would like to help with the planning.<\/p>\n

\u2013 His assistant\u2019s reply: The assignments for this term have already been allocated \u2013 but I passed it on to him anyway. (I slipped in a little request to my God at the end and told him that I\u2019d think it would be absolutely brilliant if there were a way for the top professionals to support me with this!)<\/em><\/p>\n

8. A friend, asking if I could borrow her car to transport something.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Answer: No, I wouldn\u2019t like that. The car is brand new and I\u2019ve not finished paying it off yet.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Surprisingly, another friend \u2013 without realising it \u2013 sent me an email saying: \u201eI\u2019d love to help you much more, but my time is very limited. It\u2019s not really feasible for me to set aside half a day or a whole day. But I\u2019d be more than happy to run errands for you and drive you around, pop round with some lunch now and then, or things like that, or even put up overnight guests\u2026 all sorts of things I can squeeze in here and there \u2013 I can always find an hour or two\u2026\u201c<\/em><\/p>\n

9. A cobbler, to see if he could put a hole in a belt that had become too loose for me.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Answer: OK\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

I\u2019m surprised at how keen people are to help. Of course, the fact that the ship itself will become a place where other people are helped in turn certainly plays a part in their willingness to help. Even so, it\u2019s a huge gift. And I\u2019m sooo grateful for all the help, big and small.<\/p>\n

What have I learnt about myself?<\/h3>\n

It makes life so much more relaxed and enjoyable that I can now ask for things in a completely relaxed and open way.<\/strong> I couldn\u2019t do that before. Back then, I sometimes expected others to already know or sense what I needed. But the thing is: they usually don\u2019t. Or I was worried about being a burden to them and overthought what they might be thinking, or what might be weighing on them or causing them stress \u2013 without, of course, knowing whether that was actually the case. That\u2019s why I didn\u2019t dare to voice my requests.<\/p>\n

These days, I generally assume that people are mature and capable of making their own decisions. I try to explain the reasons behind my request clearly and logically \u2013 in other words, to make it clear why I need help and why I\u2019m asking them in particular. And then I leave it up to the other person to decide whether or not they want to fulfil the request. And if they say \u201eno\u201c \u2013 like my friend with the car \u2013 that\u2019s absolutely fine by me. They\u2019re making a decision for themselves \u2013 not against me. That puts my mind at ease.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s nice to ask.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

War ich heute lebendig? Ja! Durch buntes Herbstlauf laufen und es mit den F\u00fcssen aufwirbeln ist einfach nur sch\u00f6n!h Was habe ich Neues \u00fcber das Leben entdeckt? Fragen…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_titles_title":"Leben entdecken - Fragen kostet nichts","_seopress_titles_desc":"Menschen helfen fast immer gern, wenn sie die Kapazit\u00e4ten und M\u00f6glichkeiten haben, einen anderen Menschen dabei zu unterst\u00fctzen, dass sein Leben besser gelingt.","_seopress_robots_index":"","_seopress_robots_follow":"","_seopress_robots_imageindex":"","_seopress_robots_snippet":"","_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_robots_breadcrumbs":"","_seopress_robots_freeze_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_custom_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_canonical":"","_seopress_social_fb_title":"","_seopress_social_fb_desc":"","_seopress_social_fb_img":"","_seopress_social_fb_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_height":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_title":"","_seopress_social_twitter_desc":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_height":0,"_seopress_redirections_value":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled_regex":"","_seopress_redirections_logged_status":"","_seopress_redirections_param":"","_seopress_redirections_type":301,"_seopress_analysis_target_kw":"Leben entdecken, Fragen kostet, nichts, entdeckt, Leben, lebendig, helfen, Fragen","_seopress_news_disabled":"","_seopress_video_disabled":"","_seopress_video":[{"url":"","title":"","desc":"","thumbnail":"","duration":"","rating":"","view_count":"","tag":"","cat":""}],"_seopress_pro_schemas_manual":[],"_seopress_pro_rich_snippets_disable_all":"","_seopress_pro_rich_snippets_disable":[],"_seopress_pro_schemas":[],"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_wp_convertkit_post_meta":{"form":"-1","landing_page":"0","tag":"0","restrict_content":"0"},"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1,643],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2335","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-leben-meistern-swing","category-schiff-kerstin-hack"],"featured_image_data":null,"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":1,"label":"Leben meistern - Swing"},{"value":643,"label":"Schiff und Auszeit an Bord"}]},"featured_image_src_large":false,"author_info":{"display_name":"Kerstin Hack","author_link":"https:\/\/63cfd2629054c8f4hack.de\/en\/author\/63cfd2629054c8f4\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":1,"name":"Leben meistern - Swing","slug":"leben-meistern-swing","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":1,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":552,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":1,"category_count":552,"category_description":"","cat_name":"Leben meistern - Swing","category_nicename":"leben-meistern-swing","category_parent":0},{"term_id":643,"name":"Schiff und Auszeit an Bord","slug":"schiff-kerstin-hack","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":643,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":214,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":643,"category_count":214,"category_description":"","cat_name":"Schiff und Auszeit an Bord","category_nicename":"schiff-kerstin-hack","category_parent":0}],"tag_info":false,"ase":null,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2335","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2335"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2335\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":45535,"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2335\/revisions\/45535"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2335"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2335"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2335"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}