{"id":5038,"date":"2010-12-08T16:17:20","date_gmt":"2010-12-08T16:17:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kerstinpur.de\/?p=638"},"modified":"2010-12-08T16:17:20","modified_gmt":"2010-12-08T16:17:20","slug":"the-four-stages-of-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/en\/die-vier-phasen-der-liebe\/","title":{"rendered":"The four phases of love"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/12\/Tag02_Segnenstattmeckern.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-639\" title=\"Day 02_Blessing rather than grumbling\" src=\"https:\/\/kerstinhack.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/12\/Tag02_Segnenstattmeckern-150x150.jpg\" alt=\"Heart in the hand\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" \/><\/a>A friend explained to me the other day that every love goes through four stages (he got that from a clever book).<\/p>\n<p>- <strong>Misplaced optimism:<\/strong> the famous rose-tinted glasses<br \/>\n- <strong>Well-informed pessimism:<\/strong> A rude awakening to the harsh reality<br \/>\n<strong>-Informed optimism: <\/strong> : The other one isn\u2019t actually that bad after all<br \/>\n<strong>\u2013 Hopeful realism: <\/strong> You know what you do and don\u2019t like about the other person.<\/p>\n<p>He told me that many relationships don\u2019t make the leap from phase 1 to phase 2. When the other person turns out not to be quite as wonderful as you thought, you give up and set out once again in search of someone who is \u201ebetter\u201c \u2013 someone who suits you better and fulfils more of your dreams.<br \/>\nI reckon that this applies not only to romantic relationships, but also to friendships and even to our relationship with God. At the start, it\u2019s all sunshine and roses: God forgives, God is good, a wonderful new beginning in life and lots of new, wonderful brothers and sisters.<br \/>\nAs life goes on, you then realise that God does not grant every wish and dream; some prayers are answered differently or not at all, and even those wonderful brothers and sisters have their own little flaws\u2026 just like you do.<br \/>\nIf you manage to get through this phase of disillusionment, you realise that God is, after all, good in everything. Other people \u2013 despite their quirks \u2013 also have many good qualities. And yes, despite everything that may remain unfulfilled, there is still plenty of reason for gratitude and hope.<\/p>\n<p>If you fancy a bit of light-hearted reading about love, I\u2019d recommend this, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=mhp4XKqtpYI\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer nofollow\">what children say about love on *Die Sendung mit der Maus*. <\/a><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: none; overflow: hidden; width: 450px; height: 35px;\" src=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/plugins\/like.php?href=http%3A%2F%2Fkersthackde.onpressidium.com%2Fallgemein%2Fdie-vier-phasen-der-liebe%2F&amp;layout=standard&amp;show_faces=false&amp;width=450&amp;action=like&amp;colorscheme=light&amp;height=35\" width=\"300\" height=\"150\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\"><\/iframe><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ein Freund erkl\u00e4rte mir neulich, dass jede Liebe durch vier Phasen geht (er hat das aus einem schlauen Buch). &#8211; Schlecht informierter Optimismus: die ber\u00fchmte rosarote Brille &#8211;&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_titles_title":"Die vier Phasen der Liebe","_seopress_titles_desc":"Jede Liebe durch vier Phasen geht: Schlecht informierter Optimismus, Gut informierter Pessimismus, Informierter Optimismus, Hoffnungsvoller Realismus.","_seopress_robots_index":"","_seopress_robots_follow":"","_seopress_robots_imageindex":"","_seopress_robots_snippet":"","_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_robots_breadcrumbs":"","_seopress_robots_freeze_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_custom_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_canonical":"","_seopress_social_fb_title":"","_seopress_social_fb_desc":"","_seopress_social_fb_img":"","_seopress_social_fb_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_height":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_title":"","_seopress_social_twitter_desc":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_height":0,"_seopress_redirections_value":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled_regex":"","_seopress_redirections_logged_status":"","_seopress_redirections_param":"","_seopress_redirections_type":301,"_seopress_analysis_target_kw":"Liebe, Optimismus, Pessimismus, Realismus, Gott, Dankbarkeit, Hoffnung","_seopress_news_disabled":"","_seopress_video_disabled":"","_seopress_video":[{"url":"","title":"","desc":"","thumbnail":"","duration":"","rating":"","view_count":"","tag":"","cat":""}],"_seopress_pro_schemas_manual":[],"_seopress_pro_rich_snippets_disable_all":"","_seopress_pro_rich_snippets_disable":[],"_seopress_pro_schemas":[],"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_wp_convertkit_post_meta":{"form":"-1","landing_page":"0","tag":"0","restrict_content":"0"},"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[32,1],"tags":[431,139,135,432,433,434,435,436,437,438,439,440],"class_list":["post-5038","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-beziehung-naehe","category-leben-meistern-swing","tag-illusion","tag-liebe","tag-optimismus","tag-pessimismus","tag-phasen","tag-romantik","tag-romanze","tag-rosa-brille","tag-schmetterlinge-im-bauch","tag-traum","tag-traume","tag-wahrheit"],"featured_image_data":null,"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":32,"label":"Beziehung und N\u00e4he"},{"value":1,"label":"Leben meistern - 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