Finances - ebb and flow
I’ve just got back from a short break by the Baltic Sea, which really did me a world of good. A friend and I decided on the spur of the moment to take advantage of a bargain Easter special offer to enjoy the wind, sand, sun, time, conversation, good food and, above all, books, peace, wide open spaces and the sea over the Easter holidays. It did me a world of good. I was able to switch off properly, put things in God’s hands, rest and enjoy the time.
Now I’m finding myself worrying about my bank balance. It’s a bit like the ebb and flow of the tide. At the moment, it’s low tide. Over the last few months, I’ve spent 5,000 euros more than I’ve taken in. On top of that, my kitchen timer has broken, as has the gear mechanism on my bike. It’s really getting me down. The costs are understandable. On the one hand, there are high costs at the publishing house for editing, printing, graphics and much more. Whenever we produce new titles, we have to pre-finance them first – the income only comes in later, with a time lag. And then there’s the repayment of a loan for the boat, plus high costs for materials (composting toilet, paint for the decks, screen-printing plates for the floors, double-insulated portholes). Given the high costs, „only“ a loss of 5,000 is actually quite acceptable. But I can’t keep going through many months like this, otherwise I’ll be completely broke.
It’s quite a challenge to strike the right balance. On the one hand, there is trust in God – He IS the Provider, and the natural world, now in full bloom, demonstrates His generosity in abundance. And on the other hand, there is wise planning. The Bible calls for both – deep trust in God’s goodness and provision, and wise planning as someone who acts responsibly.
I'm finding it really hard to plan properly at the moment because so many factors are still unclear.
– Income – As a self-employed person, I don’t receive a salary, but live off the profit I make. However, it’s hard to predict whether there will be any profit, and if so, how much. The winter months are Publisher and Coaching It’s often good, but the summer months tend to be rather lean – though that’s precisely when the high costs of new titles come in. In my line of work, a good month can be three times as good as a bad one is bad.
– Other income: I’m trying to sell as many second-hand items from my flat and the boat as possible – but whether and how quickly that will work, and roughly how much I’ll make from the Selling second-hand items on Amazon or on eBay is just as hard to estimate as the total value of the gifts I receive for the ship project.
– Shipping costs – I’ve received quotes for some of the major items still to be sorted, such as solar panels and ventilation; other costs depend heavily on how many – skilled – volunteers I have, and how much of the work I need to outsource to external contractors. That could account for up to a third of the costs. Of course, I’m hoping for plenty of helpers. And that the whole project will be finished in just a few months.
In short – I can’t really put a figure on it 100% – probably not even 50 or 60%. All I can do is hope that after the ebb comes the flow – I’m grateful for the last few months, which have been rather bountiful. And month by month, plan and make decisions wisely with what’s available. Keep personal spending to a minimum, for example by eating up what’s in the freezer instead of buying fresh food. And put off any spending that isn’t absolutely necessary. I can’t see much further than a month ahead. But I can continue to trust in my God – he has carried me through so far – and will surely continue to do so. For sure.
As I was out walking and praying today, the thought kept going through my mind: 
Entrust your path and whatever troubles your heart to the most faithful care of the One who governs the heavens.
He who guides the paths of the clouds, the air and the winds will also find paths for your feet to walk upon.
And I’m also really looking forward to my birthday coming up soon … and the fact that the first presents have already arrived … Yippee!
