The beauty of imperfection

A civil engineer was on board at the weekend. And was - to put it mildly - surprised at how we were tackling the project. A specialist, Helge, a trained boat builder, with whom I co-operate, and occasionally an electrician. Apart from that, there are helpers and I, who generally have little knowledge of the subject matter and are doing a lot of things for the first time. It's not always quite as drastic as in the case when we asked a helper to saw up old wood - and saw up our sawhorses at the same time. But often the work steps have to be explained by Helge or - if I already know how to do it - by me. Which takes time and energy.

The engineer told me how he would do it: take out a loan, then have professionals come in and finish the ship quickly. There's something to the idea (apart from the fact that I already have loans totalling three years' income and am not keen on more): Finish quickly. Being able to inaugurate and use the ship soon. Move forward quickly. Have free weekends again. Finish quickly. Faster - instead of laboriously, small step by small step. Oh, I think I'm repeating myself.

Today I worked out how many more hours of skilled labour I would need (professionals or experienced amateurs):

• Joiner for ceilings, walls, floors, doors: 280 hours
• Specialists for heating, water, sanitation: 80 hours
• Electrical and solar: 80 hours
• Welding work, especially railing etc.: 40 hours

All in all: 560 hours. Plus at least as many helper hours for painting, decorating and cleaning. At the current rate, another 6 months.

When I started to imagine how much faster it could be done with professionals, I started to cry. Yes, it takes energy to do a lot of things with unskilled people. And I love it when visions soon become reality and things happen quickly. I love efficiency, whether in coaching, books, cleaning or building. Having a team of one to four carpenters on board for a fortnight to finish all the ceilings, floors, walls and doors - that would be incredibly nice.

In dealing with the impulse, I realised that my thinking and my imagination are limited. The fact that Jesus could give me money for so many hours of skilled labour is just beyond my thinking. I tend to think small. Step by step. In what is possible right now. With what money is available. To think in a completely different way, to finish building the ship quickly and then pay back the loan - I haven't even dreamed of that option yet.

As I thought and prayed, I realised: What I long for most is lightness. It almost doesn't matter how it comes - that's something I've learnt in the Non-violent communication I have learnt. Once you know what the unfulfilled need is, you can fulfil it in various ways. In my case, for example, by calmly accepting the slow, favourable but rather cumbersome processes. Or by making rapid progress. In my experience, whenever I have found out what my need is, the main inner work is already done. The rest then usually becomes clear quite quickly.

Then I asked myself and Jesus how HE would prefer to build my ship:

• As before
• With more experts
• With a mixture

I thought of David and the men and women he gathered around him and moulded. And of Jesus and his non-specialists in spiritual ministry, whom he chose as a team. And of how much good happens during construction. With the people who help on board, with me through the encounters with them. How many short impulses are passed on between changing colours and rolling walls. I thought of the two people who placed their lives in the hands of Jesus for the first time or anew through the encounters on board. The ministry of the ship has long since begun. People are changed and renewed while they are on board and meet others and me. What I want for the ship when it is finished is already happening.

I can feel how precious that is. I definitely don't want to give it up. And at the same time, I long for some relief. To make progress a little faster than before. Although everyone who hasn't been on board for a while can't shut their mouths. „Wow, you've come so far!“ (Everyone who comes for the first time can't get it shut either: „Wow, that's a lot of work!“). I don't know exactly how Jesus thinks that the work on the ship should continue, but I now know what to look for I I long for. My dream would be to work for 3 weeks as usual. And one week a month to have a specialist (professional craftsman or experienced layman) or several on board who can contribute their expertise and experience to help the project take a leap forward.

And that's what I'm praying for now: 1 tradesman week per month. Until we are finished. Specifically: that skilled craftsmen give me a week of their time every month or that other people enable me to hire skilled labour on a project-by-project basis for a week through earmarked donations. I'm curious to see if and how God answers prayer. And if you want, help... by covering the costs or by telling tradespeople you know about it and inviting them. Small groups are also great (2 - 4 people who can work together for a few days and are welcome to stay on board during this time).

And non-tradespeople are also welcome. There is still enough work for all of us! 

(By the way, did I mention that it's lovely on board in summer? Watching sunrises and sunsets, having a barbecue and jumping into the Spree if necessary! Dreamlike).