Men can be close. Really now

There is a belief among women that men are not keen on closeness. I think that's a rumour. If you open your eyes, you can see the close bond - in films, for example, where men lean back and drink a beer after a hard day's work. Or the joyful closeness when your favourite team wins.

Real closeness fascinates me when it doesn't scare me. That can also happen. It has so many forms and facets. Communicative closeness, i.e. familiarity that is created through conversations, is just one of them.

The communicative proximity is of course very valuable to me. I've just finished a new ebook with 36 questions, which, although 36 questions to fall in love with but can also create a deeper closeness between friends.

Longing for closeness - I am convinced that both women and men have a deep need to experience closeness to other people.

The silent revolution - how trust and closeness grow

Yesterday I got the "proof" of this. I was a guest at a screening of the cinema film die Silent revolution. The film describes the journey of entrepreneur Bodo Jannsen with impressive images and clever interviews. He experienced a shock. In a survey, employees said they would be better off if he were gone. He then embarked on a slow, steady, silent path towards more openness and participation.

Afterwards, Nikolaus Förster, editor-in-chief of the inspiring business magazine Impulsesseveral panel discussions with Bodo Janssen and the maker of the film, Kristian Gründling from Green film.

I have no idea how Mr Förster did it: He somehow asked the questions in such an emphatic, inviting and clear way that they went deep for everyone involved. Bodo Janssen, too, when asked how the film came about.

"I had been looking for a volunteer at a seminar who would talk about the highs and lows of his life with the help of a life line (time line). Gründling had the courage to speak openly in the middle of an acute crisis. He let his trousers down. That gave me so much confidence that I invited him to film us."

"He dropped his trousers," said Janssen. Translated into women's language: he showed himself to be vulnerable. This courage gave Bodo Janssen so much confidence that the basis for a moving film was created. Without an agenda. On the basis of solidarity and trust.

If anyone ever tells me that men don't want to be close to each other or that they "only want one thing" (what do you mean, isn't one thing beautiful?), then I'll tell them about Silent Revolution. And also about the vulnerability between two men that made this film possible.

Do it yourself: 

The same Ebook with the 36 questions and get involved in closeness with a person.